30-year-old employee has quit 9 jobs in 11 years, starts to hate himself for it: 'I think it goes deeper than laziness'

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Emmy Pratt • Writer and Editor
Jun 30, 2025 12:00 PM EDT

We're told we shouldn't tie our self-worth to our ability to work, but that's easier said than done. When you meet a stranger, one of the first things they ask is, "What do you do?" which is a fantastic question to answer when you work for a meme website, but it's more challenging when you're out of work or constantly switching between careers. The people who say "it's okay not to be defined by your work" are typically those who have either interesting jobs or well-paying ones. If you have neither, it's hard to believe that. 

Having a job you don't love might be hard on you, but if you're able to stick it out for a couple of years, you're more likely to be able to find a new job that better suits your needs. But if you constantly hop between low-paying gigs, it'll be a lot more challenging to grow in your career. 

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  • 01

    I’ve quit 9 jobs in 11 years and I’m starting to hate myself. I think it goes deeper than laziness Vent 😭😮‍💨

    I'm in my early 30s and I've quit 9 jobs over the last 11 years. Some lasted a few months, some maybe a year or so, but the pattern is always the same:
    via u/Sad_Fact_5916

  • The dude in this story is 30 years old and has had nine jobs in eleven years. He claims that once he gets bored with a job, he packs up and leaves because he can't picture doing that same thing for the rest of his life. This strategy has cost him a lot.

  • 02
    I start out motivated or at least trying hard. But after a few weeks or months, I burn out mentally, feel overwhelmed, drained, and start checking out. I either quit or ghost.
    via u/Sad_Fact_5916
  • 03
    Cheezburger Image 10523886080
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 04
    I was recently diagnosed with ADHD, and it makes me wonder if this is part of it. I get bored fast, hate repetitive tasks, and feel mentally exhausted way before others do. It's not that I don't want to work - I just can't seem to last.
    via u/Sad_Fact_5916
  • 05
    I finally told my wife what's been happening, and thankfully she was really understanding. But I still feel like sh. I'm tired of this cycle. I want to feel like I can stick with something without falling apart.
    via u/Sad_Fact_5916
  • 06
    00000000000
    via Meritt Thomas

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 07
    Has anyone else been through this? What kind of jobs worked better for your brain? And how did you stop feeling like a failure?
    via u/Sad_Fact_5916
  • 08
    Cheezburger Image 10523872768
    via Getty Images (Unsplash+)

    The image does not depict the actual subjects of the story. Subjects are models.

  • 09
    KristinoftheDeAd ADHD here. I'm 39. I've had over 30 jobs for this reason. As soon as things get "too much" you bail. Best way I found is giving yourself dopamine somehow every time you are shutting down whether it is a snack, an iced coffee, a break with fresh air anything that makes you happy or relaxed. We also need to take frequent breaks to stay motivated. Use the reward system with yourself. Good luck.
    via u/KristinoftheDeAd
  • 10
    1morepl8 36 ADHD, and not so many jobs. I always climbed as far as I could, fast promotions etc. The dopamine came from just achieving something. Then I get to a place where it's either unlikely to go farther, or a lot of work for little return and id quit. As soon as I can't keep learning I bail. Somehow that got me into logistics management (which actually felt great, because logistics is
    via u/1morepl8
  • 11
    absolute chaos). Also bounced between a normal job and being self employed a few times. Now I have a small trucking company. I just have to pay other people to do all my paperwork. That was a series of expensive lessons. For me it was just managing the dopamine loop. to stay interested, but when I couldn't id start moving on.
    via u/1morepl8
  • 12
    WanderingBraincell I'm in your boat, once there's no more "progression" to make, I check out. either fixing up stuff or just constantly learning, IT was pretty good for this but I have a knack for diagnosing systemic issued and seeing the root cause of problems, and 90% of the time it is upper management/decision makers being lazy, out of touch, stingy or a combo of all 3 and it makes me rather unpopular with those sorts.
    via u/WanderingBraincell
  • 13
    beautifulmikasaakari Relatable as h I. Once the learning stops and the dysfunction starts feeling permanent, it's hard to stay motivated. Funny how the biggest "system issues" always trace back to someone in a corner office with no clue.
    via u/beautifulmikasaakari
  • 14
    Classic-Progress-397 I have a solution for all of you. We are motivated by novelty and urgency, so get jobs that have these in spades. Paramedics, outreach workers, nurses, doctors, and social workers all deal with constant changing clients, patients, and problems. You are a natural problem solver, find a job that requires this skill.
    via u/Classic-Progress-397
  • 15
    Sad Fact_5916 OP I wish I could be like this, but things move too slow for me. And a lot of the time, i feel like imposter syndrome takes the wheel, and I Syke myself put if that makes sense. In a lot of places I work, I feel like I'm not meant to be there or I can't see myself working in the same place for the rest of my life.
    via u/Sad_Fact_5916
  • 16
    judithishere You should talk to a professional about the ADHD. They can help guide you on how to survive/exist without being miserable.
    via u/judithishere
  • 17
    sbdallas I hate to say dr__s are the answer, but as bipolar patient whose life was saved by dr__s, go see a psychiatrist and get some dr_s. Despite all the problems that exist in the modern healthcare system, they really can fix some things that, just 50 years ago, were unfixable.
    via u/sbdallas
  • 18
    AnonyGuy1987 The modern working world doesnt work for anyone, its just too much time. I couldnt even do a task i love for 40 hours let slone a job. You gotta claw back as much time as you can at a job. Half of that is finding a job where you can slack off if you need a break.
    via u/AnonyGuy1987
  • 19
    Theres also dropping your hours if you can afford it and can get the workplave to agree. I finally got a job where i can slack off a few hours a day and only do 4 days and now its bearable.
    via u/AnonyGuy1987
  • 20
    SongsForBats "I couldnt even do a task i love for 40 hours let slone a job." This too tho. I love creative writing but I would probably start to hate it if I was forced to do it for 8 hours straight, 5 days a week. People need breaks. I also love working out but I cannot imagine doing so for 8 hours a day with like a 30 minute break.
    via u/SongsForBats
  • 21
    Coffin_Nailz 40 with ADHD and I like to tell people that I've walked out of more jobs than some people have had What I've found is that I always do a great job and work hard but with pattern recognition I notice when things could be improved. And, I need to know why I should be doing something - management hates any challenge to status quo. Additionally, I loathe ass-
    via u/Coffin_Nailz
  • 22
    kissing with every fiber of my being, which inevitably gets to be tough. I truly feel like the way work in this country is structured is not for our brains AND is insanely exploitative. So it's not just you or really is all of us being worked to but even more acutely for the neurospicy of us. - I wish I had an uplifting close but I just send comraderie and knowing that you are very heard and understood
    via u/Coffin_Nailz
  • 23
    Available-Ad-5081 My ex with ADHD enjoyed nursing because it was so different day to day and stimulating. But I think medication and treatment is first a priority. I highly recommend doing some career tests to identify what energizes you. Part of the issue may be
    via u/Available-Ad-5081
  • 24
    that you think you're interested in these jobs, but the reality of them is different. See if you can identify jobs tasks you enjoy and are good at, then find a career that best matches. Perhaps you could find a job coach or career counselor that specializes in neurodivergence.
    via u/Available-Ad-5081
  • 25
    Trifle_Southern Yes I've heard a lot of people with ADHD are nurses or servers (like me!) I need to be constantly moving and things need to be changing, I could NEVER work in an office, and with serving you get into a rhythm and it becomes like a mindless meditation- you just turn your brain off and flow.
    via u/Trifle_Southern
  • 26
    Also serving is nice because the schedule is extremely flexible you can work one shift or work a double, work only 3 doubles a week or do 4 days a week, nights only, days only, whatever works for you. You can also easily call out and often you can throw a shift up and someone will take it so you don't have to even call out. Likewise, if you're short for money one week you can pick up an extra shift from someone.
    via u/Trifle_Southern
  • 27
    Also work doesn't follow you home, when you're done for the day you're done and you aren't getting any calls/texts on days off. It doesn't work for everybody but I've always made great money and had the work/life balance I need!
    via u/Trifle_Southern

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